My kids are #blessed with loving, kind, fun, and generous grandparents. They take them places, have them over their houses for sleepovers, do fun activities with them, and generally just make them feel loved, seen, and cared for. I also don’t think I can remember a single time when they’ve come back from spending any amount of time with them when they didn’t have at least a small present in tow. A new stuffed animal, a(nother) Nerf gun, a Polly Pocket, a trampoline. Sometimes, it’s honestly just too much. But TikTok account @morethangrand has advice for this all too common parenting issue, where everyone means well but signals get crossed.

“If you find yourself buying more gifts for your grandchild than you know their parents would like, there’s a generous solution.” Bestie, say less… after you say more, though, because we want to know what this solution is.

“Too much stuff from grandparents is at the top of the list of topics that parents struggle with,” says DeeDee Moore, a grandma who runs the account and accompanying site. “75% of the parents that we surveyed wished grandparents would respect their wishes about gifts. Parents have many reasons they don’t want too many gifts from grandparents. The one most often cited and most often waved away by grandparents is the sheer volume of stuff. Parents often don’t have the physical space to accommodate the toys indulgent grandparents buy.” (Can confirm: my two bedroom apartment I lived in when my children were babies in no way could hold the couch-sized stuffies that routinely entered my home thanks to grandparents.)

More goes on to point out that one particular grandparent isn’t the only person giving a child a gift, and then offers some perspective.

“Say your grandson has four other grandparents and four aunts and uncles. Each of these people get him one gift for a second birthday. That’s already nine gifts plus something for mom and dad. We’re up to 10,” she says. “But if all of those grandparents buy him three things, and two of the aunts get him a little extra something, that’s 22 presents for a 2 year old who would be just as happy with a box.” (Can confirm: toddlers love boxes.)

So what’s to be done? Well, it’s a simple solution, really.

“While your grandchildren are faced with getting too many gifts, many children are in the opposite situation,” she says. “Take some of the things you bought to Toys for Tots or another organization that provides gifts for less fortunate families. That is the true spirit of giving.”

A desire to spoil? A child in need of a little bit of spoiling? It’s almost too perfect!

So grandparents, the next time you see something in TJ Maxx or Marshalls that’s just too cute not to buy, go ahead and get it, and give it to a little one who would not only love it, but can really use it.